May 2011
4 posts
3 tags
On Reasoning
Give me a reason to put on a dress and heels
And I’ll give you a reason to rip them off
4 tags
On Ditching
I may be a WASP but I would ditch you in two seconds for Jay-Z.
I’m just a little scared of Beyonce.
Only thing holding me back.
3 tags
On Time Allocation
One hour spent doing the following things equals one hour of me in Sephora (on your dime):
-Fantasy Sports
-Me…Alone…in the car…with your mother
-Not having a meltdown when your college girlfriend sits with us at your old roommate’s wedding
-Shopping for hunting/fishing equipment
-Class Reunion
-Looking for THAT file of us on your computer/phone
4 tags
On Friendship
I promise to be grateful each time you hang out with my {insert derogatory adjective/four-letter term here} friend and/or her {insert derogatory adjective/four-letter term here} significant other.
